The past few days have been drawn out, stretched to every hour being as elapsed minutes. Saying good-byes that I’ve never wanted to say. Giving parting hugs and prayers to brothers and sisters. Things that no one really never wants to experience, but you know it needs to happen. Through all this chaos, I truly know I’m supposed to stay here in Herrnhut, no matter who comes and goes. I know my place is here, where God has called me to be. For me, that makes me joyous and hopeful. Even if I see my brothers and sisters leave, not knowing when I will physically see them again.
I now have moved my belongings, packed my bags and headed to a new apartment. I can not stand to live in my old room, where no one lives in anymore except me. I needed to leave that place and experience something new for awhile. Today I moved into a nice apartment in town. Moved into a room fit for 6 people, but only me living there. Imagine 5 empty beds, then my bed, and 3 giant windows overlooking the town.
I’m trying to keep myself occupied in these next 3 days before I go to London for a week. I hope to be in the darkroom printing photos from Ethiopia. My goal is to have 5 perfect prints for London before I leave. My goal as well is to not focus on what the past was, but to move on, and aim for the goal and what lies ahead.
During this time in my life, it really makes me evaluate, question and reflect if this is really what God wants me to do with my life. If I really heard his voice on this subject, in this time. If I am really being obedient to what He has asked me to fulfill. I feel a bit discontent, not knowing how money is going to come in for rent, for daily food, for traveling expenses, for school in May. But why do I need to know all these things? I know God has them in His hands. He has asked me to come here, without any money, knowing I just graduated high school, never lived alone and never travelled the world. I did, I was obedient, and I know He will do His part in my life. I need to have confidence in times where no one is around, everyone leaves, and it’s just my own decisions that effect my life.
Solitude, is also the best thing for me right now. Having time alone, to think, to read, to write, to listen to music, work on photos, play guitar, sleep in, take time to walk slowly in the woods, pray in the hills, and just meditate, reflect and worship. Those are so important.
My future plans, as I know for right now :
+ London for a week to pray about my future as a photographer
+ Intercession (Prayer) School starting in May
+ Friends from Wichita, KS coming to see me on April 18th
+ Hopefully coming home for the first time in one year to Wichita, KS in Aug/Sept
Share with me how you are doing in a comment, or any questions you have.
Hope to hear from you soon.
